Charlie Sheen ... Topper Harley
Lloyd Bridges ... Tug Benson
Valeria Golino ... Ramada Rodham Hayman
Richard Crenna ... Col. Denton Walters
Brenda Bakke ... Michelle Rodham Huddleston
Miguel Ferrer ... Harbinger
Rowan Atkinson ... Dexter Hayman
Jerry Haleva ... Saddam Hussein
David Wohl ... Gerou
Mitch Ryan ... Gray Edwards (as Mitchell Ryan)
Michael Colyar ... Williams
Ryan Stiles ... Rabinowitz
Rosemary Johnston ... Lavinia Rodham Benson
Ben Lemon ... Team 2 Leader
Buck McDancer ... Richard Nixon
Larry Lindsey ... Gerald Ford
Ed Beheler ... Jimmy Carter
Daniel T. Healy ... George Bush
Jay Koch ... Ronald Reagan
Charles Haugk ... Navy Seal
Dian Kobayashi ... Mrs. Rodham Soto
Bob Vila Bob Vila ... Himself
Stuart Proud Eagle Grant ... Geronimo
J.D. DeKranis ... Michael Corleone Look-Alike
Bob Legionaire ... Captain McCluskey Look-Alike
Corey Rand ... Sollozzo Look-Alike
Tony Edwards ... Limo Driver
James Lew ... Kick Boxer Opponent
Gerald Okamura ... Corrupt Kick Boxing Referee
Chi Muoi Lo ... Thai Kick Boxing Sportscaster
Ron Pitts ... Black Kick Boxing Sportscaster
Norm Compton ... Phil
Kelly Connell ... Radio Operator
Wayne Satz ... News Anchorman
Pat Harvey ... News Reporter
Joseph V. Perry ... Singing Waiter
Oz Tortora ... Singing Busboy
Judith Kahan ... Veiled Woman
Shaun Toub ... Sleeping Guard
Mark Steen ... Adrian Messenger
Carey Tall Sr. ... Train Conductor
Don Miloyevich ... Cab Driver
Ed Nassaney ... Iraqi Door Guard (as Edward Nassaney)
Andrew M. Siegel ... Iraqi Soldier (as Andy Siegel)
C. Ransom Walrod C. Ransom Walrod ... Iraqi Boat Driver
John Escobar ... Necktie Guard (as John Arthur Escobar)
Scott Reeves ... Navy Seal
Christopher Lindsay ... Navy Seal
Daniel Herold ... Navy Seal
Thomas Temple ... Navy Seal
Lindsay Kough ... Navy Seal
Dennis Barglof ... Navy Seal
Michael Templeton ... Navy Seal
Andrew Link ... Navy Seal
Keith Woulard ... Navy Seal
Dan Jessee ... Navy Seal
Chris Sweeney ... Navy Seal
Timothy Henkel ... Navy Seal
Melanie Asistores ... Raker Girl
Tiaraya Soo ... Raker Girl
Haeran Park ... Raker Girl
Carol Tong ... Raker Girl
Susan Salgado ... Raker Girl
Nancy Abrahams ... Mother Whose Baby is Snatched
Charlie Abrahams ... Snatched Baby
Jane Butenoff ... Slim Woman at Banquet
Louise Yaffe ... Gray Edwards' Concubine
Eleanor Schiff ... Gray Edwards' Concubine
Pamela Thompson ... Nun Not in This Movie
Karen 'Boom Boom' Proft ... Nun Not in This Movie
Nancy Steen ... Nun Not in This Movie
Don Gruenberg ... Backyard Family
Alice Gruenberg ... Backyard Family
Jamie Abrahams ... Backyard Family
Joseph 'Bambi' Abrahams Joseph 'Bambi' Abrahams ... Basketball Player
Alison Anne Abrohams ... Chain Skimmer
Jack I. Bernstein ... Cop (as Jack Bernstein)
Deborah Hwang-Marriott ... Kickboxing Mother
William Haig Marriott ... Kickboxing Child
Shelley Beattie ... American Gladiator (as Siren)
Raye Hollitt ... American Gladiator (as Zap)
Bunga Hosoi ... Spectator (uncredited)
Andreas Katsulas ... Rufshaad (uncredited)
Clyde Kusatsu ... Prime Minister Soto (uncredited)
Greg Michaels ... Extra (uncredited)
Martin Sheen ... Capt. Benjamin L. Willard (uncredited)
Gregory Sierra ... The Captain (uncredited)
Stewart Skelton ... Secret Service Agent (uncredited)
Kent Winfrey ... Co-Pilot (uncredited)

Topper Harley is found working as an odd-job-man in a monastery. The CIA wants him to lead a rescue mission into Iraq, to rescue the last rescue team, who went in to rescue the last rescue team who... who went in to rescue hostages left behind after Desert Storm. The President is Tug Benson, who also likes to be in on the action. Basically, it's a send-up of all the big shoot-em-up Rambo/Robocop/T2/Commando-type movies.

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